Too many questions

July and August (so far) has been nothing less than a roller coaster ride. So many things happening all around me. Some that bring joy others that arouse sadness and some that makes me stop and thing – how stupid can I be?
So many moments and events that have shaped and reshaped the course of life. So many feelings playing in my mind. So many things I wanna talk about. So many things I wanna share.
Lets take this one by one:

Loved
I am blessed. I have felt true love not once, not twice but three times. I have always received more love and care from them than I could possibly imagine. Its true, guys cannot match (don’t even come close) the love and care that a woman (in love) can shower. Pure. Unconditional. Selfless.
Sometimes I wonder if what I feel is at all LOVE. Is it pure, unconditional and selfless?

Touched
All the people in my life whom I admire lookup to and am really close to have touched me in a way which words just can’t explain. I wanna be like them. Do things the way they do. Think the way they do.

Loosing
The feeling they you have something so special and that you are going to loose it … killing. Trying desperately to hold on and the rope is just slowly slowly slipping away.

Disappointed
I really enjoy my work. Though I may crib about it feel that I am not doing justice to the work entrusted on me … still I love what do. For a person like me who gets bored with stuff very fast and can’t do routine jobs for long, challenges are a must. Consulting is the field I guess can keep me engaged. At the end of the day money is also important and with me getting married soon (for those of my friends who have been living under a rock … the big day is on 26 Feb 2009) finances are on my mind even more.

Interview
No job interview I am talking about here. Trust me they are much easier to go through and crack. You can prepare for them and rehearse for them. Whats difficult is an interview with your prospective father-in-law. There is so much at stake … your life and your future. I have never been so nervous … ever in my life. I was sure I will screw things up bad. I reached 15 min earlier and was waiting with a lump in my chest almost choking me. Today as in remember that day again is feels so funny and stupid. I was unnecessarily scared and anxious. As they say … all is well that ends well. I don’t know if I managed to impress my father-in-law or not but what matters that now I am engaged.

Engagement
I never thought it would be so easy. Things happened more smoothly than I had ever imagined it in my dreams. In fact I had thought of all possible things that could go wrong and prepared a contingency plan for each one of those scenarios. Perhaps I was so busy thinking about the things that could go wrong that I never imagined things would just fall in place.